Is It Really All About Money?

My parents taught me that money meant nothing. It wasn’t important. In fact, my mom liked to joke that the biggest arguments between married people revolved around money, but my parents never fought about money. As she put it, "There was nothing to fight about."

Even the teachers at the school I attended for most of my young life—grades 2 through 12, except 6 and 10—taught that money is the root of all evil. Oops, they later corrected themselves, “Money is the root of all kinds of evil.” Is that really any different? To a kid, it all sounded like money equals evil.

After many years of being broke (literally holding my breath as I watched my bank account dwindle to a few dollars until it would be meagerly replenished come pay day), I said enough. I want more. I want more freedom to do the things I want and to care for myself and my loved ones. And I want less. I want less stress wondering how I will pay for the essentials, like housing.

It also occurred to me that maybe others want more and less, and maybe I could help them. You see, while my parents instilled a disdain of money in me, they also instilled a sense of mission. For the longest time (yes, even to this day and as cheesy as it sounds), I want to change the world.

I realized: I want to make as much money as possible and help others make as much money as possible.

At first, I felt the need to justify this realization: I don’t want money, I want to be able to get the best medical care for my son. Or, I don’t want money, I want to have a safe car. Well, duh. Money is not a doctor that can treat my son. Money is not something I can sit in to take me from place to place. Money is the means to achieve the end. But I feel I deceive myself when I say I want the things money can buy instead of saying that I want money itself.

You can’t strive for the thing and hate the means of achieving the thing. Well, you can, but that causes a lot of stress. Eschewing money is also disrespectful to money. Think about it. Your grandma buys you a gift and you love and enjoy the gift while simultaneously disparaging your grandma.

Instead, I look at money for what it is—an amazing thing that I honor and respect and want more of in my life and the lives of my family, friends, and clients. The more I make money welcome, the more money helps me get what I want.

And do you want to know another important thing about money? Money reveals. The more money I have, the more it shows how much value I bring to others. We see this principle demonstrated everywhere. Why does the manager make more than the people she manages? She's bringing more value by coordinating the team's efforts rather than just providing her own, individual effort. People vote with their wallets. If they give me money, they are saying that I provided more value to them than the money they give me (I mean, why would someone willingly overpay? We spend money when we think the value of the thing we receive is greater than the money we are paying for the thing). So the more money people give me, the more value I've given them. Pretty cool, right?

Is it really all about money?

What do you think? Email me with your thoughts at amber@ambergw.com.